Relationships - Unhappy Relationship But Can't Leave - Why It's So Hard To Leave A Toxic Relationship

Relationships - Unhappy Relationship But Can't Leave - Why It's So Hard To Leave A Toxic Relationship

What Makes Leaving A Relationship Difficult?

Leaving a relationship have to be the most difficult part of any relationship. You wish to never reach this end but if you do then you have to. 

Often the challenge of leaving a relationship gracefully is how to end a relationship without hurting any body’s feelings. The effects of rejection and the guilt you would have to feel if you make a person seem rejected is a most difficult concern. 

When somebody is leaving a relationship, it often is difficult to avoid thinking that if someone no longer wants to be with them then there must be something wrong with them. They see the break-up as a negative reflection of their worth as a person.

On the other hand, it is a fact that there are very few people with whom we would feel that deep connection. We don’t feel connected to most people, so there’s no reason to think that just because someone no longer feels any more connection in the relationship then there’s something wrong with one (or both) of them.

All of us have met perfectly wonderful people yet just don’t feel the connection, and that is just the way it is. No use to feel rejected or guilty.

Leaving a relationship doesn’t mean judging a person’s adequacy. In the first place, you started with the relationship with the assurance that you would respect and care for each other no matter who they are.

And so, when leaving a relationship, this special bond doesn’t necessarily go away. If it is considered that it’s better to end the relationship, more often than not, the reason is that the relationship is just not ready or fit to proceed into the next level.

Still in some cases, when a person leaves his/her partner, most often it’s really not because his partner is inadequate, rather the person who suddenly decided to let go of the relationship is the one having a problem of staying in any relationship – the ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ concern. In my opinion this is the first thing to mull about when choosing to leave a relationship. 

Nonetheless, it may be better leaving a relationship than waiting, and waiting still, hoping to give time to feel the connection which you know would most probably won’t come. Whether or not the person you left felt hurt after the breakup, you can’t say you’re responsible for how he/she feels.

In this case it would be better of if he/she thinks that the end-up wasn’t a judgment of his worth, that it’s just the way it is, they’re just ‘not meant to be’, that it just might actually be for his own good. 

Leaving a relationship gracefully simply means speaking and accepting the truth. No judgment and the burdening responsibility for the other person’s emotions. Though you will get hurt, the beautiful thing in the end is that both of you could still smile looking forward to searching for your perfect match. 

Relationships - Why It's So Difficult For Women To Leave Abusive Relationships

Relationships - Why It's So Difficult For Women To Leave Abusive Relationships

Why Women Stay In Abusive Relationships

The reason why God put the brain on top of the head is because we’re supposed to use it more often than any other part of our body. 

However, few people ever see this significance. They say that there are no real geniuses when it comes to being in a relationship. There are some people who are holding prestigious positions in big companies, but are not as successful in their private lives. 

It doesn’t necessarily mean that only the jobless or those without promising careers are entitled to have harmonious relationships. In truth, you good and happy relationship is built, not acquired. The responsibilities have to done by both parties and not by a single person. 

Stories about abused women are all but a common thing in every society. Each story is as familiar as the next one. And no matter how many others have set examples there are always those who unrelentingly fall into the pit. 

Why women stay in abusive relationship is one of the many questions that continue to hound the human race. Even with constant interventions from family and friends, some of these women seem to think that nothing is extremely wrong about their relationships. They are in denial about any abuse because they think they have themselves to blame for it. 

Other women stay in abusive relationship because of fear. Some abusers threaten to do harm to their partners and/or their children. Also, some women have the fear that they won’t be able to financially support themselves and their children if they leave their abusive partners. 

If a woman believes that she has no place else to go, she would just bear all the abuses in her relationship. She may have been isolated from her family and friends to ensure that she will give her total submission once she realizes that she is alone in the world.

One of the main reasons that some women do not end a relationship no matter how abusive their partner is because they don’t want to act against the teachings of the church or the norms of the society. They’d rather pretend that all’s well, rather than be different from the others. 

Love is the most common alibi why a lot of women are trying to live with any form of abuse. They think that suffering is an essential part of a strong commitment.

But if a woman will start to feel bad about herself, then she should assess her and her partner’s feelings. No one has the right to put you down and strip you of your self esteem. And love, despite challenges, should make us free and happy, not otherwise.  

Relationships - What Is A Relationship - Understand The Various Definitions Under Different Context

Relationships - What Is A Relationship - Understand The Various Definitions Under Different Context 

What Is A Relationship? As Differentiated And Divided Into Schools of Thought

Boyfriend and girlfriend, husband and wife, mother and daughter, father-in-law and the bride, employer and employee, acquaintances – these are just some examples of relationships.

Seeing the words and pairings at a glance, some sort of meaning could already be picked up from them. Yet how do we really define a relationship? What is a relationship?

An encyclopedia defines a relationship, specifically an interpersonal relationship, to be a social-association, affiliation or connection between two or more people, and, different relationship types vary by levels of intimacy and sharing. This definition implies the discovery and establishment of common ground between parties involved – intimacy.

The different levels of intimacy are of major importance when answering the question “what is a relationship?” Kinship, whether by blood or by affinity, has a different level of intimacy when compared with long-term relationships like marriage because how a husband acts around his wife would obviously differ from how he acts around his mother-in-law.

Casual relationships, those involving sexual behavior, have different levels of intimacy when compared with platonic love relationships, those involving affection without being sexual. Friendship, consisting of mutual love, trust, respect and unconditional acceptance is different from being an association which could be gleamed simply as a formal introduction to an economically beneficial network. 

Differentiating between the different relationship types may be easy but there are actually deeper thoughts to truly answer the question of “what is a relationship?” Sociology, psychology and anthropology are areas of study that is concerned with relationships. What is a relationship as it is viewed by these three areas?

What is a relationship, as studied under sociology? Sociology deals with studying currently changing behaviors, actions, and interactions of people in any type of relationship while recognizing many other links of greater or less importance.

Psychology’s concerns on what is a relationship, deals with trust issues, control and acceptance in relationships, primarily dealing with its relation to an individual’s personal wellness. Anthropology’s concern though on what is a relationship, deals with how (traditional prevalent) culture in general affects relationships.

Practically, these three sciences set relationships into a perspective that most people who have not had successful relationships, puts relationships into light and make others realize what went wrong in their relationships in the first place. 

Learning of how broad the spectrum is on defining a relationship, one would be able to figure out that relationships are variable according to diverse factors. One minute, it’s there, another minute, it’s gone.

Knowing how a relationship is defined, finding common grounds, interacting with others and understanding the deeper schools of thought involved with relationships will ultimately determine how successful a relationship can be maintained. 

Relationships - What Does It Mean To Be In A Relationship Led By A Woman

The Female Led Relationship

Throughout history, women have played the submissive partner between the two genders.

Source: Canva

Before, women were seen as nothing, as Napoleon once called them, ‘machines producing children’.

But over centuries, with several protests as regards women’s rights, feminist protests, and the gain of society’s female-role acknowledgement, gender roles no longer plague women.

Today, women can be seen outside of their homes working alongside men. Equal footing in the work force is one thing, but how about relationships? How does society view a female led relationship?

What exactly is a female led relationship? At first glance of the words, one would think “Venus on top”, or “lady of the house”, or without any grace in tongue, a woman running things.

Perhaps that is exactly what it is but also note that there is more than one person involved in a relationship. For a woman to be leading that relationship, both parties must come to the mutual decision for that to be.

One situation that can fall into the category of a female led relationship is if the woman turns out to be the aggressor. Simply put, in the relationship it’s the female that ends up making the decisions.

The woman may have been the one to pursue her husband and it is her that makes the other moves to help move the relationship forward. However one common misconception about a female led relationship is that it is only the woman doing the job.

This is untrue. A situation wherein the male works with a successful job with his wife being some sort of secretarial can also fall into the category of a female led relationship.

How? It’s his wife setting up meetings with executives, it’s his wife making sure he goes to work prepared, it’s his wife making sure his presentations are audience-friendly – that’s how. It’s the female that plans and sets up everything and the male’s job is to execute those plans.

Some people are still not as open to any female led relationship. However, this tunnel vision on relationships does not necessarily mean they are chauvinists. Perhaps it’s because of being too familiar with gender roles and that the male is usually the one dominant in a relationship.

Source: Canva

But with the growing trends these days and with women showing up in places that they normally wouldn’t be in, society’s views are, once again, no doubt, ever to change. No longer is the world just “a man’s world”.

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Relationships - Should You Get Into A Relationship With A Big Age Gap?

Relationships - Should You Get Into A Relationship With A Big Age Gap?

Age Gaps in Relationships

The idealistic society looks at age gaps in relationships as a rather important aspect for enduring relationships. A number of societies strongly encourage and believe in relationships with ideal age differences. The “older-husband-younger-wife” relationships are more commonly acceptable than relationships where the woman is way older than the man. Although some may find the focus on age gaps in relationships somewhat inane, it is in fact one of the important factors that affects the outcome of relations.

A case in point is the “same age” relationship; more often than not, having the same age as the other is good for friendships but not best for long-term marital commitment.  Same age couples tend to have the same level of thinking and at times cannot comprehend with each other’s point of view as they see things in the same angles; as a result there are more miscommunications than understanding. 

Nevertheless, age gaps in relationships are no longer considered a big issue in today’s much more liberal society, taking into consideration the acceptance of common divorce and remarriages, although affecting the purity of marriage, has scraped off the naïve thinking of “perfect age relationships”. 

The new standards of living together, single motherhood, same sex relationships, and others, have opened freedom to relationship restrictions, as well as the liberty of getting into a relationship with big age gaps in both men and women.

Even though the reality that age gaps in relationships make a big difference, a lot of people still choose to get into these types of commitments and their relationships work in a different way, especially for older women and younger men relationships.

According to different studies big age gaps affect the quality of spousal bonds with weakened significance therefore adding more tension to the relationship.  Since big age difference is one aspect that influences the success of marriage, an appropriate age gap between two people is advisable.

As with age gap statistics, it has been established that marital relationships where husbands are way older than their wives, are more possibly to fall apart than those relationships of couples with similar age or that of which wives are older than husbands.

The ideal age gap that has proven to work best is when the man is five years older than the woman; the gap doesn’t put much dissimilarity in their age, thus with their outlooks and thoughts.  

Before getting into relationships with age gaps, there are three things to take note of: be old enough to have life’s experiences, hence adequately mature to understand life and its necessities; neither of the persons involve have a dilemma with age gap; and lastly, there should be a connection between the couple that make them right for each other.

Relationships - Depression In Relationships And The Reasons You Might Be Prone

Relationship Depression

Source: Canva

There are basically just two kinds of relationships: one that is happy, and one that is otherwise. There are no in-betweens. No one can have a so-so relationship. Just as no person can halfway commit himself to a relationship. It’s either he is all for it, or totally against it. 

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Most relationships, whether serious or not, start out with half truths. It doesn’t mean that people give out false addresses and bogus phone numbers, but, it means that people put on a show. They put in their best foot forward and display only the best of themselves.

However, there are some couples who eventually learn to see beyond each other’s facade and accept everything about their partners. Those who never had the chance to show who they really are must live up to that false pretense. This lie can be very destructive as it can lead to relationship depression. 

Source: Image Search Man

A person, who suddenly sees her partner rear his ugly head, may have a hard time dealing with it. For a relationship to work, each party should start off as the very person that he truly is.

This prevents unreasonable expectations which can fuel relationship depression. A commitment built on lies is not only unhealthy to the one being fooled, but, to the dishonest individual as well.

Most often, those who are in suffering from relationship depression are those who are being dominated by their partners. People who are abused, regardless of the type, are very prone to have relationship depression.

It is important for couples to be accepting of each other’s strengths and weaknesses. If both parties keep an open line of communication, there wouldn’t be any chance for one to fall into a dark pit. Relationship depression can be mostly developed from pent up anger and frustrations. 

Persons who have to deal with partners suffering from relationship depression can actually do more than just make the world pass them both by. Being the “healthier” one, you must educate yourself about the illness. Ask the right help from the right people.

Even if it is your partner is going through relationship depression doesn’t mean that you can’t go through the same thing as well. Take care of your partner but don’t neglect yourself too. Your partner’s behavior may let you feel worthless sometimes but if you let it affect you, you’re as vulnerable to suffer from relationship depression.

Source: Canva

Relationship depression is a nasty thing. It strips someone of his social skills. We are all susceptible to go through it if we let everything get into our heads. We should take things in stride. After all, if everything goes dark, there’s always that light at the end of the tunnel.    

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